Self-Command And You

"The 9 Keys to Complete Self-Command,"

1. Enter any situation with supreme confidence.
2. Remain calm and effective under all circumstances.
3.Be in charge of your emotions, your thoughts, and your actions.
4.Always be fearless about the future because you are in command of
your destiny.
5.Know that you can take any experience -- even if it's challenging or
scary -- and turn it to your benefit, so that you become inwardly stronger
and more flexible
6.Enrich all of your relationships, never be manipulated or intimidated,
and feel at ease just being yourself.7.Discover how to reawaken your inborn ability to command the
moment.
8.Never again be afraid of losing your cool and saying something you
don't mean.
9.Learn how to tap into mental powers you already possess.

Who Am I

Who Am I? What Freud have to say?There has been lots of research addressing the possible causes of transexuality, yet nobody really knows the answer. What causes a male to wanting to change himself into a female and a female wanting a male body? Most of us are perfectly comfortable with the fact that we are male or female. In fact, we normally never give it a thought. However, a few people feel they were born with the wrong body - men who feel they are trap in a female body vice versa. These people suffer from a recognized medical condition known as gender dysphoria (American Psychological Association, 1994), and are generally referred to as transsexual. One may think that transexuality is hereditary. Nevertheless, until this point of time there is no proof of any genetic link to the condition, therefore it is not something that is known to be passed down through generations of the same family. Nobody knows exactly what causes the condition, although there are various theories that consider a possible link between hormone disturbance in the mother during the first weeks of pregnancy or other interruptions to the normal course of pregnancy while the foetus is at a critical point of development.Gender dysphoria occurs when the person believes himself or herself to be a woman, their brain knows them to be a woman, even though their physical body may be that of a man. The society believed the only 'cure' for gender dysphoria is to change the body to match the brain. Therefore, after surgery both brain and body are those of a woman. Now, this person is in all respects a woman; even her passport will show this. They should rightly expect to be treated as the woman they know themselves to be. Is this change necessary? Can it be cure without surgery?George A. Rekers, PhD research studies appear that a preventive treatment for transvestism, transsexualism, and some forms of homosexuality may have been isolated early identification and early intervention in the childhood years. George found that the social environment of child rearing is primarily implicated in the etiology of the psychosexual disturbance. He evaluated 70 gender-disturbed boys and after following through a boy from 8 years, 8 months until he was 16. Carl came from a broken family in which his mother had four marriages in lifetime. At age 4 he was pronounced feminine voice inflection and feminine speech content. After a 15 month with a combination of treatment program in the clinic, home and school-setting and individual counseling for the mother and her marital problems and family relationship difficulties. There remains no trace of any feminine behavior or cross-gender identification in the boy after treatment. In this case, George A. Rekers proof that the absence of male role models is the biggest contribution to gender disorder such as transexuality thus supports the Gilligan’s Boy Theory.The second strand of Gilligan's boy theory believed that the disorders of boys stem from their separation from female influence, but the biggest problem facing boys is the absence of fathers. Boys need to get in touch with their feelings. Boys need positive male role models, thus healthy father figure is so essential in each family. Susan Coates, Ph.D. (1990) quoted; Gender identity (the sense of either being male or female) is not directly determined by the genetic code. Rather it is a psychological construct that emerges early in life (between 12 and 18 months) because of interaction among biological, developmental, and psychological influences. Which reveal to me that gender disorder such as transexuality can be cure if discover when the child is below 10 years of age.Freud (Freud, Sigmund 1905) theory believes sexual life does not start with puberty it starts with birth. In his third stage theory - Phallic Stage: 3.5 - 6 years, Feud believe the child’s sexual drive is slowly directed to the parent of the other sex, the boy being attracted to his mother and the girl being attracted by her father. That way, the parent of the same sex becomes a rival, the superiority of which lets the child fear possible punishment and leads to a bad conscience for his own thoughts. The boy’s fear to be castrated by his father makes him repress his desire for the mother into the unconscious and forces him to identify with the father: the Super-Ego in the boy cause him to feel that if he becomes like the father, the more he can unconsciously replace him.One cannot help but to link Freud’s third stage theory to Gilligan's boy theory (Gilligan, C. 1982). In these two theories it clearly show that if there is an absent of father figure the boys has no one to compete and no male role model to focus on. The child grow up in such family might swift his fear and repression to a different direction thus causes him to identify with the mother or sister and his Super-Ego in this boy steer him to feel that if he become like his mother or sister, (when one of them threaten his position), he can replace her one day too.Summarising, transexuality is not hereditary; social environment, family upbringing, self-esteem plays important role in a child’s life. Treatment and counseling therapy is a definite solution and not surgery to change one’s body into the imaginary gender. Parents and childcare providers should play an important role in spotting gender disorder children before he reaches post puberty genital stage, where changes are near impossible.

Help our future generation

I am saddened by the recent political scene in Malaysia; First, calling names like ‘katak’ to one another in parliment, please don’t teach the young Malaysian wrong attitude, we are teaching moral in school but the leader behave worst than young students in the school; my children saw the parliament debate, heard the name calling, they laugh, they copy. My student started to use words they heard to disturb one another… hai… sad, what will our youth become in future?
Secondly, our leader fight with the authority, teach the youth how to run away from their wrong doing by constructing drama and gain sympathy from foreign country so that the law have to hold back investigation.
One of my problem student from a single parent family learned fast; one day, he was caught stealing, when the class leader caught him he ran to the field, screaming and yelling that just because he is from a poor family everyone hates him and accuse him, then all the parent who waited outside for their children came in and scolded the class leader and the teacher for bullying the boy…we were speechless! (Whatg can we say? Seeing is believing!) We took him to the headmaster’s room; he told the headmaster if he tries doing anything to him he will report to US????????? All the teachers inside the room were speechless. Where did he learn all these and how he know such a thing about reporting to US? Suddenly, all the teachers looked at one another and we know where he is coming from. We inform his parent and sent him for counselling. While the adults are busy making ends meet in this difficult time, where everthing is going up in price, we have less time to spend with our children, pleasehelp us by showing our children good behaviour in speech and good conduct over the air and the media.

I don't care about politic, who win who loss, I don't support any particular party, and I know nothing about politic but I know good adult produce good children, good leader produce good citizen. Please, leaders of Malaysia, you can fight and win, but what kind of citizen you will have in future?